The topological properties of planetary fluids are typically analyzed by mapping classical fluidequations onto complex quantum mechanical models. Here we present a purely real, six-dimensional Stueckelberg quantum mechanical formulation of the rotating shallow water equations to demonstrate that these topological features are intrinsic to the classical kinematics itself. Operating entirely within R^6, we decouple the complex quantum geometric tensor into an independent, real Fubini-Study metric and a real antisymmetric Berry curvature. Our real-variable approach explicitly derives a topological magnetic monopole of charge C=2 and captures the inherentscale invariance of the fluid's geometry without the need for complexification. We suggest that continuous variations in the Coriolis parameter may dynamically model the deep-time planetary evolution of the Archean Earth, and we propose a laboratory rotating-tank experiment to physically measure this topological phase transition. Finally, we show that our real 6D formulation naturally maps to unbroken supersymmetric quantum mechanics. By identifying a purely real supercharge and calculating a fluid Witten index of W = -2, we advance a mathematically supported viewpoint that steady-state geostrophic weather patterns represent the unbroken, zero-energy supersymmetric ground states of the rotating fluid system. Consequently, the topological isolation of this vacuum naturally restricts the spectral flow across the equator, providing a theoretical explanation for the unidirectional eastward motion of equatorial boundary waves.